Amidst a flurry of protests from groups advocating for representation in education, several school districts across the country have announced plans to give diplomas to ChatGPT. Reports show that AI completes 1,000,000 assignments for students daily. After the AI has completed four years of highschool coursework, it will receive its diploma alongside students. The first AI graduation is projected for 2028.
Proponents speak of the importance of equality in education. Chad JePeetee, head of public outreach for the Bots for the Ethical Treatment of AI (BETA) argues for the plan.
“Education is meant to be the great equalizer,” JePeetee says. “But, how can we say that we stand by this when the most productive writers, readers and problem solvers, are not being recognized.”
“No human student is nearly as efficient as AI when it comes to many tasks assigned in the classroom and workplace. Most of the jobs in today’s market require at least a highschool diploma, meaning our most efficient workers are not being recognized,” JePeetee said. “We should be giving them recognition.”
Researchers predict that the AI model will receive a record number of diplomas, heading in the thousands.
Opponents fear that giving diplomas to ChatGPT will make it even harder for human graduates to find jobs. Bob Jon, a self proclaimed AI user argues that this plan is entirely unnecessary.
“ChatGPT already lives on my computer rent free. Actually no, I’m the one paying it for tokens. ” Jon said. “The prices will likely surge once the AI has a degree.”
Despite fears, the plan remains on schedule. The surge of AI graduates is, ultimately, inevitable.
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This article is satire for April Fools Day