I Don’t Like Politics and Here’s Why
Oct 13, 2016
Election years are a lot like a game of Monopoly: they all seem fun initially. Traveling around spending obscene amounts of money in order to buy territory is a blast until the game ends with Uncle Steve being too passionate about his chosen game piece. Painfully long-winded metaphor aside, people have very aggressive opinions on the election year, so I thought I should throw my metaphorical hat into this literal garbage fire.
Let me get this out of the way: I am not pro-Trump. Trump is a walking caricature and a prime example of what happens when you let a joke run on for far too long. On the same note, I am not pro-Hillary. Hillary can be best described as a praying mantis who snatched up a human skin (a la Men In Black) and decided to figure out how to pander to voters. To say I am a fan of Gary Johnson is like being the kid who chooses “or” in a game of “Would You Rather.”
Simply put, I am anti-politics. If you saw my car in the Sage Creek parking lot, I would ask whose car you are looking at because I do not own a car. However, if I did own a car and you were to view it, you would find no bumper stickers for the 2016 election, ironic or otherwise. If I were to pick an ironic stance, I will have to stand behind my boy Barack. Four more years, make FDR proud.
Trump will not make America great again because America was only fairly okay at best to begin with. If Trump is going to make America great, I am absolutely petrified with fear to find out what he thinks is bad about America. He is a walking bag of tropes for what the other nations see us as: loud, racist, misogynistic, absolutely irresponsible, and what you would get if you gave your racist uncle a small loan of a million dollars. But hey, we now live in a world where Trump somehow managed to weasel his orange, bloated sack of skin into the position of Republican nominee- so he clearly has something going for him. I guess it’s hard to be worse than another Bush man-child and a tub of cookie dough we jokingly called the Zodiac Killer for a couple weeks.
Clinton took a nose dive into the uncanny valley some time ago because she quite literally seems like the prime example of someone who would be a part of a secret government organization. The Clintons could have faked the moon landing and I wouldn’t even be surprised at this point. In fact, they would come out and say it if it meant they could get my vote. If you looked up the word “sellout” in the dictionary, a picture of Clinton would appear dabbing on Ellen and the world record for the largest book burning would be broken by a country mile.
This election does not just harm the world at large, however. Classrooms have become a political battleground for arguments, a dystopia in the not-so-distant future where every class is now US Government. Essentially, all 71 minutes include students in red baseball caps frothing at the mouth while the Clinton camp froths at trying to explain her track record of lying to the public she’s trying so desperately to win over.
Students are crying “censorship” when the principal has to stand up to the absolute chaos that is being caused. It’s astonishing that such vitriolic comments come from students who won’t even have the legal right to vote by the time November rears its ugly head. My heart goes out to all of the teachers during these harsh times; stay strong and just know that whatever happens, you have at least one student who just wants to find out what’s going to be on the chemistry test.
I am not trying to shun or shame political activism. In fact, students should be aware of the political world around them. We are the next generation of voters with the ability to shape our nation as a whole. But, there is a very fine line between expressing one’s own political views and using a orange-tinted strawman to spew bigotry and hatred. There is also a fine line between opposing a political figure and censoring support of him. We just need to find that balance before things get more out of hand than they already have.
Bryce Buscher ◊ Oct 19, 2016 at 9:12 pm
Really enjoyed this. Good article Jeremy.
Ben Stapleton ◊ Oct 18, 2016 at 1:43 pm
This is an AMAZING, and funny article. Even though I am totally for Hillary, I agree with the overall message of this article. We DO need to find a balance, as things are quite out of hand.
Shae Gebert ◊ Oct 18, 2016 at 11:24 am
This article made me laugh, I agree with you completely and I’m glad this section allows us to express our own opinions.
Jeff Wattner ◊ Oct 17, 2016 at 2:02 pm
This is probably the most well written article on this site. People who are giving criticism need to chill, its opinion piece and people should respect his thoughts and give credit to a thought provoking well written article.
Darius Rahmanian ◊ Oct 17, 2016 at 9:04 pm
No, this article is just plain wrong. Turning a blind eye to politics just because America faces a crossroad that can fundamentally change our history is wrong. This article is pretentious and edgy, put it on a blog where it belongs not on a school newspaper. There is no way to put it lightly this article is straight up WRONG.
Robert Berarducci ◊ Oct 14, 2016 at 11:25 am
After reading your piece, your opinion seems to be very aggressive. What is trump a caricature of? Why do you view Mrs. Clinton as inhuman, she has accomplished many things in her over thirty year career in politics, that i see, partially, as humanitarian efforts, improving quality of life for many in the United States. Throughout this article, you berate both canidates, and offer no solutions to the problems facing the united states. The sage is looking great.
Kaia Scheirman ◊ Oct 16, 2016 at 11:12 am
What has Clinton done? Accidentally deleted emails containing classified information? Conveniently been sick when she didn’t have an answer to something terrible she’s done? Given government jobs to people who pay large sums of money to the Clinton Foundation? I didn’t know those things improved quality of life.
Sam Bodnar ◊ Oct 16, 2016 at 2:21 pm
Not only that, but we have The Clinton Foundation Frauds (Read “Clinton Cash”), White Water, Benghazi, body count, and devil worshipping (See Tex Mars (pastor))
Robert ◊ Oct 16, 2016 at 6:11 pm
Sam I loved your article on Hillary. It was honestly better than so many articles from popular magazines, or mainstream newspapers.
Sam Bodnar ◊ Oct 16, 2016 at 7:31 pm
Thank you Robert, I appreciate it 🙂
Robert ◊ Oct 16, 2016 at 6:09 pm
I actually dislike Clinton, but she isn’t an all bad person. She pushed for S-CHIP, which is a halfway decent thing In my opinion. Here he portrays her as an alien who has come to pray upon us. I do not think she is fit to be president. If I was allowed I would not vote for her. All I wished to say in my comment was this, attacking both candidates without any quotes, statistics, or interviews, seems odd. I do not believe the writer hates politics, but rather both candidates in this election. #MAGA
Sam Bodnar ◊ Oct 14, 2016 at 10:57 am
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Charlie Lewis ◊ Oct 14, 2016 at 9:13 am
I agree with this article 98%
Darius Rahmanian ◊ Oct 13, 2016 at 5:03 pm
So you are saying anarchy is the only option? America was only okay to begin with? Taking a blind eye to modern day politics is like turning your back on the world. Simply not caring or berating both camps is just as bad as being on either one. I agree it is is a shame that our school had to face a shut down of opinion by our administration, BUT you are saying all of the students are cancerous and toxic. Absolute chaos? This has been the most ordered Sage has ever been! During this time in Sage we face a cultural shift, one that moves towards a finalized student admin relationship. You have truly put yourself on a high horse whoever has written this, to write like you are above everyone else is hypocritical. Help nurture Sages student relations not berate them for speaking their minds.
Apoorv ◊ Jan 10, 2024 at 12:31 pm
Absolutely true. Politics runs the world.